Mastering Dining Etiquette: Avoiding the Seven Deadly Sins

Creating a good impression at the dinner table

From audible chewing to reaching across the table, the dining room remains the most revealing setting for character. Here are the seven most common transgressions — and the elegant alternatives.

The Table Reveals Everything

There is a reason the formal dinner endures as the setting of choice for diplomacy, courtship, and business. The table, more than any other social arena, exposes character with quiet, unforgiving accuracy.

These are the seven most common errors — and how to correct them gracefully.

I. Sitting Before the Host

Wait. Always wait. Until the host — or the most senior person at the table — takes their seat, you remain standing. This single rule, observed consistently, communicates volumes about your social intelligence.

II. Napkin Negligence

The napkin is placed on the lap the moment you sit — not tucked into the collar, not folded into origami. When leaving the table temporarily, place it loosely on your seat. At meal's end, place it naturally to the left. Never refold it.

III. The Premature Cutlery

Cutlery is not a drumstick. It rests between bites — knife and fork apart at the 'resting' position — and signals completion only when placed side by side at six o'clock. These signals communicate silently with your host and waiting staff.

IV. Speaking with a Full Mouth

This requires no elaboration — yet its frequency at even distinguished tables is remarkable. Take smaller bites. There is always time.

V. Reaching Across the Table

"Please" and "Thank you" were not invented for decoration. They are the machinery of civilised life.

If something is out of reach, you ask. You do not lean. This applies to salt, pepper, bread, water and conversation alike.

VI. The Mobile Phone

The phone belongs in the pocket or handbag. Placing it on the table — even face down — signals that whoever might call is more important than the person across from you. It rarely is.

VII. Leaving Before the Host

As with sitting, so with leaving. The meal concludes when the host signals — not when you have finished pudding. Grace under boredom is itself a social skill worth cultivating.